This time last year, my brother, sisters and I, and our wives, husbands and children, were taking turns standing watch over Mom as she struggled to recover from her surgery. Mom had woken up a couple of times, but was still not quite aware of what was going on.
Our families were assured that the doctors expected a full recovery. Dr. Harold Picus, informed us that the surgery was successful, and they got all the tumor. He said Mom would need some time to recover, but was doing well after the surgery.
This was just the beginning of the worst eight weeks of my life so far. Mom continued to recover slowly, the first five or six days in ICU, then to a room at Mission. Mom was awake at times, she was eating some, and showing signs of recovering.
After a short stay in her room at Mission, the Doctor decided Mom was well enough to be moved to Care Partners for rehabilitation. If you have never been to Care Partners in Asheville NC, pray that you never have to. This is an example of what is wrong with the way we treat our elderly. They place a cagelike covering over the bed of anyone they think may wander, or get out of bed if they are not able to walk. They will deliver the meals and just leave them sitting in the room whether you are able to eat them or not. They will occasionally assist a patient to the bathroom, but they seem to find it easier to just let them do their business in bed, and clean it up when they have time.
Next, the people at Care Partners decided Mom was ready to go home. They assisted us with getting the equipment Mom needed. They also worked with my sister to show her how to help Mom. She came home and was able to get up and sit at the table and eat periodically, and need assistance to get to the bathroom and shower. Again all the women in the family were there to help with anything on the "personal" care level. My oldest sister spent most of the nights at the foot of Moms bed sleeping in a chair in case Mom needed something. The rest of the family were there to help whenever they were able.
After a week at home, Mom was taken back to Mission emergency room, with severe hemmeroids and abdominal pain. She was also not eating well. Again we were all taking turns sitting with Mom and trying to help wherever we could. Sometimes, we would just sit and talk with her. It was very encouraging to see her  able to have a conversation.
The Doctor at Mission was helpful in explaining what Mom was eligible for under medicare guidlines. That was a stay in a "skilled nursing facility".
The facility that she ended up in was Hendersonville Health and Rehabilitation, a Sanstone facility. She was transported by ambulance to HHR on October 19, 2011. I remember driving there after work that day. From the outside the place looks beautiful. The lawn is manicured, the bushes trimmed, pretty flowers are all around the building, there are rocking chairs on the front porch.
When I went inside for the first time, the woman at the front desk told me what room Mom was in and the warning bell should have gone off when I got to that room and whoever that poor woman was in that bed was not Mom. I went into the hall, and a gentleman pushing someone in a wheelchair, asked me who I was looking for. He then directed me to a room that was not the same as what I was told at the front desk.
There was my Mother, lying in bed with my sister sitting next to her. A woman in scrubs came in and took an inventory of Moms personal belongings, and left. I was surprised at the condition of the room itself. The paint was scraped off the wall in places, from the moving of beds and chairs. The furniture was the finest any discount store had to offer. There was another bed, but no one was in it at the time. Mom was able to have a conversation, and knew what was going on. She needed help with bathroom trips and bathing. Again someone from the family was with her most of the time, even overnight for the first couple of days. It was creepy, the lady across the hall kept screaming and calling for Jenny. There were many unusual noises at all times.
Mom got a roomate on the second day, she was probably in her thirtys, and was there for IV medication for a serious infection. We all befriended her, she was a light in the darkness for Mom. She would call the nurses when they would not answer the call light outside the room. She was a sweet caring person.
More to come.