The third anniversary of Mom's death has come and gone and the memories of her last days are still haunting me. The fact is that Hendersonville Health and Rehabilitation and SanStone are still being allowed to ignore NCDHSR regulations.
After Mom died I had to visit Hendersonville Health and Rehabilitation several times to obtain records and such. After that I had no intention of ever going back there again. Then earlier this year, a member of my church family was admitted to Hendersonville Health and Rehabilitation. He was nearing the end of his life due to cancer. I'm not sure how I got the courage to go through those doors again, but I went to visit him there.
I drove up to the building that was so full of bad memories, parked my car and took a deep breath. Walking up to the door was one of the most difficult things I have ever had to do. Then when I stopped at the desk I was directed to his room. He was in room 101 A, it must have been a test or something. The same room and bed that Mom spent her last night in. I had not been in that room since November 2, 2011, the day before Mom died.
I walked down the main hallway feeling like the walls were closing in on me. I looked at every nurse and wondered if they had known my Mom. I actually walked by Tammy Mace, the nurse that found Mom the morning she died. I turned the corner and there was the desk where I was told Mom was not responding and had been sent to Pardee hospital. And then I turned the corner and there was the room, I hesitated for a moment then went into the room. There was my friend lying in the bed my Mother had died in.
That's when things changed, all I could think about was the man lying there knowing he was near the end of his life. I visited him regularly, and the other stuff seemed to go away. At first he was pretty much in bed every day when I arrived. I would sit on the edge of the bed and listen to his stories and tell him mine. As the days went on he was able to participate in some physical therapy. I would sit with him as he did as much therapy as he could. One day when I got there he actually took a short walk with a walker. He would ask about my day and I would ask about his.
As the days went on I started seeing the same things that I had seen in Mom's records. The nurse would come in and tell him they didn't have time for his shower that day. His oxygen mask didn't fit right and was cutting into his face .After several days they finally got one that fit him. His clothes were not always clean and he needed help reaching his water.
Then he started losing his strength and would be less able to participate in therapy. I asked if I could take him outside for a while. We sat in the sun and talked till he started getting cold. Then back inside for therapy, which didn't last very long. He was wheeled back to his room, and the nurse asked me to try to keep him in his wheelchair for another twenty minutes. While we were sitting there talking, he stopped talking momentarily. I asked what was wrong and he looked down to the floor where there was a puddle of urine. I asked if he wanted me to get him someone to help, he said he would just wait till they put him to bed. After ten minutes or so he asked me if I could get someone to change him. I went to the nurses desk and asked for help in getting him cleaned, the nurse told me to push the call light and someone would be in. It took at least another fifteen minutes till the nurse showed up. Then they just changed him and put him in bed.
He maintained his positive attitude but felt like he was a bother to his caregivers. More and more I realized that things were actually worse than we thought with Mom. They didn't even seem to care whether anyone saw how they treated their patients. They were always short of staff and the quality of care suffered. I would visit on weekends and there was hardly any staff at all.
My friend made it through his twenty one days that Medicare approves and he had to be moved. It was decided he would be moved to an assisted living facility. I visited him at Hendersonville Health and Rehabilitation the day before he was to be moved. The next day my family and I went out of town for spring break. He died the day I came back from my trip. The last time I got to visit him was in Hendersonville Health and Rehabilitation.
I am thankful for our time together, I'm not sure who was actually helping who. Scott helped me get past many things and I hope I helped him in the end of his life. As Christians we talked about religion and our beliefs, but we also talked about food, driving and Family. I miss my friend but I know we will talk again some day.
Hendersonville Health and Rehabilitation has no regards for the NCDHSR regulations. They have no fear of being cited or fined for their actions. The point of this story is that they were not providing adequate care in 2011, and they are not providing adequate care in 2014. The NCDHSR has no interest in finding violations or enforcing their own regulations now, and they had no interest in 2011 either. Based on the actions of the NCDHSR, elderly people have no right to be treated with dignity or respect while in a nursing home. Shame on them for what they allowed to happen to my Mother and my Friend.
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